Every parent out there prefers it, if their child develops a positive attitude. All of us would like it if our kids had or developed a positive outlook towards life. Because lets face it life isn’t perfect and we all will get better rest knowing that our children are equipped with a positive attitude to help them cope with the ups and downs of life.
Besides how we perceive and think about life experiences has an impact on how we feel and our health. If your child’s brain goes naturally to the negative, you’ll need to open up new neuronal pathways for more positive thinking. And it takes – writing, talking, movement, drawing and more to build a positive attitude.
So if you are wondering how to develop a positive attitude in your child? Or if you are a parent struggling with developing a positive attitude in your kid, then following these simple tips will serve the purpose well.
Be a role model
We all are aware of the fact that our children are excellent observers. They learn mainly through observation. Might I ask, “Observing who exactly?” Us parents of course! Therefore it is absolutely necessary for us to monitor our behaviour, because actions speak louder than words. Besides our kids can’t be fooled by our mask’s. They sense and understand things; sometimes even better than us. And can even show us that they don’t too. Hence if you want your child to have a positive attitude than it starts with us. Try not to lie to your kids, they will sense it immediately. But if you have to, then explain to them Why? So that they understand and prevent misunderstandings from cropping up.
By Thought, Word and Deed
If you want to reinforce and develop a positive attitude in your child then you need to ensure that you speak, think and address your child in a positive way at all times, if possible or as and when it is applicable. So here is a list of positive words that you can use on a regular basis to instill a positive attitude in your child:
- THINK in a positive way
When things are most likely to go wrong either way; instead of complaining, think objectively and come up with solutions. If an alternative is not available at presents then use humor – such as learn to laugh at your self, smile, believe in your self and know that you will eventually figure out a way somehow.
- TELL your child
- Yes, Good Fine, Very good, Very fine, Excellent, Marvelous, At-a-boy, Right, That’s right, Correct, Wonderful, I like the way you do that, I’m pleased with (proud of ) you, That’s good, Wow, Very nice, Good work, Great going, Good for you, That’s the way, Much better, O.K., You’re doing better, That’s perfect, Good idea, What a cleaver idea, That’s it, Good job, Great job controlling yourself, I like the way you ______, I noticed that you ____, Keep it up, I had fun ______ with you, You are improving at ______ more and more, You showed a lot of responsibility when you ______, Way to go I appreciate the way you ______, You are great at that, Good remembering, That’s beautiful I like your______, I like the way you ______ with out having to be asked (reminded), I’m sure glad you are my son/daughter, Now you’ve got it, I love you!
- SHOW them how you feel
Smile, Nod, give a pat on the shoulder.
- SIGNAL or GESTURE to signify approval
High five, Touch cheek, Tickle, Laugh (with, not at), give a Pat on the back, give a Hug instead.
Teach your child to understand emotions
Although most children can sense both positive as well as negative emotions, sometimes they lack the understanding of the emotion altogether. They are usually caught off guard and are unaware of the reasons behind it. At times they may even misunderstand the emotion and take it to be that the teacher doesn’t like me or my friends don’t like me. At such times the following tips will help you to guide their understanding of their emotions and even help you to realise yours!
You can take a play ground ball and bounce it and bounce it back and forth between the two of you. Talk in a slow and easy manner about your child’s concerns. Ask open-ended questions. If your child cannot put the experiences into words, offer your ideas and ask, “Am I getting this right?”
“It seems like something is on your mind.”
“Shall we talk about it?”
“How are the kids treating one another at school?”
“What do the kids do that is kind to one another?”
“What do you see when people being mean.”
“How would you like things to be different?”
As your child starts to explore his thoughts and feelings ask him if he’s open to “drawing it out.” Sit down at your kitchen table and begin with a simple exercise.
“Take an 8 X 11 inch piece of paper and draw a line in the middle. On the left side you can make a note of the negative thought and on the right side note down your transformed positive thought.”
“This time follow the same process but ask your child to note down their negative thought about their experience and on the right side help your child to transform the negative thought into positive ones and make a note of it.”
Another option is to “Take an 8 X 11 inch piece of paper and draw 2 lines dividing it into 3 equal parts. On the left side you can make a note of all the negative emotions, on the right side note down all the positive emotions and in the middle ask your child to either draw or write down the emotions they are feeling. Once they have done this you can then help them to identify whether it is a positive or a negative feeling or if they have been able to distinguish between the two.”
By following these simple tips your child will begin to think and develop a positive attitude nonetheless.