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Parents and Peer Relations – What Parents Should Do but Don’t?

By | October 26, 2013
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parents and peer relationshipMost parents these days are on the lookout for their kids’ well being right from the pre-school years to high school days. At times we parents make judgements based on appearances, with the rise in the offences committed against children in today’s day and age it has become all the more important to keep tabs on our children and sometimes we tend to go overboard out of concern. As you struggle with your kids to get information to your W/H questions namely With, Where, When, Why, Whom and How, to ensure that they inform you about their where about it is probable wise to get to know the crowd that your kids are interacting with on a regular bases just to make sure that they are safe and alright. So here are a few ways that can reduce your apprehension for your kids’ safety.

1. Spend More Quality Time:  it is essential that apart from engaging your child in extracurricular activities, you ensure that you spend time with them not just time but quality time. By helping them with their homework, projects, engaging in casual conversations at the dining table, letting them assist you in the household chores that you have to do from time to time, if cooking the meal for the day takes assistance.

2. Be Involved: ensure that you are involved in their life by questioning them on their day has been, experienced any surprises, find out about how their schoolwork has been or any tests round the corner, find out when their play or game is etc. In short get to know how they are doing at school, in sports or the extracurricular activities that they participate in so on and so forth.

3. Get to know your Child’s Friend Circle: the best way to do this is by not making judgements based on the appearance of their friends but by getting to know them. Some possible alternatives to get to know their friends are listed below:            

    • Participation: if your child is participating in a sport, be present to encourage him / her on while paying attention to the team-mates and their behaviour 
    • Practice Sessions:  during practices if possible, spend time on the side lines and pay attention to their team – mates 
    • Engage in Casual Conversations: while at a game or practice speak to the other parents and find out about them and their kids and get their contact no.s, they will come in handy in times of need 
    • Offer Assistance to the Coach: lend a helping hand while at the play-ground and lookout for any signs of things going wrong and speak to people present with and around you 
    • Speak to the Classmates or Teammates Present on the Playground: find out how they are doing and ask them about your child and his / her friend circle

4. Pay a Visit to the School or College Premises: whenever you visit the school or college be sure to be alert at all times while paying attention to the crowd of students present, speak to students about your child and find out about them as well.

5. Get Contact Numbers: when visiting the school and college or at the playground get the contact numbers of the people you are present often like the coach, a professor, assistances, your child’s friend’ phone numbers. So that if you can’t get through your child you can contact these people.

6. Speak to Professors and the School Counselor: it is essential that you keep in touch with these individuals because they will be able to give you insights into your child’s behaviour, well being and performance.

7. Ensure that you have Some Way of Contact with your Child:  it is essential that you are able to contact your child at all times.

8. Make Use of Technology: since we are surrounding by technology, it is wise to ensure that your child has a cell phone or make note of a friend’s phone number that your child usually interacts with on a daily basis. So that you can contact him / her directly. If you are unable to personally meet with the professors, coach or the school counselor then take down their email address so that you can contact them via mail. It is preferable if you have a contact number though!

9. Equip them with Safety Skills or Self Defence Strategies: give them tips on how to protect themselves if they find themselves alone. For instance if they find themselves in a dangerous situation  tell them to call if they have a cell phone, if unable to give missed calls. Give them a set of numbers that they can easily reach you no matter where you are. Highlight to them that these numbers are meant for urgencies and not small talk. Give them a pepper spray if possible or a weapon to protect themselves with but ensure that they understand that it is only a preventive measure and not to harm someone with it.

10. Enroll them for self defence Classes if possible:  this will help them to protect themselves and to give them enough time to contact you or to get help if necessary.

Following these simple tips will ease your apprehension for your kids. Make sure that you explain to them the importance of informing you at all times about their whereabouts. If you do these things, your children are more likely to inform you about where they are and you won’t have to pester them for information. They usually tend to not attend to your calls. For more information you can visit www.careerfutura.com.

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